I have been stirring this idea around for a while, and as 2010 comes up, I've already got my eyes set on the 2010 football schedule.
I'm not gonna lie, the results from the SI poll about the rudest fans in the Pac-10 got a bit under my skin. However, I have heard a lot of crappy stories. If I had a dollar for every time I heard a story of someone's windshield getting bashed in because it had an OSU sticker in the window, I would be both rich, and making money in a really weird way (Mitch Hedberg for the win). Personally, I think 90% of the time I've heard these things, I think it's either hyperbole or a complete lie. But, the fans were polled and the results are that Oregon has the largest asshat per capita in the Pac-10.
I've tried to discuss the "rude fan" bit with other fans, and try to convince these fans that every fan base has its bad apples. However, almost every time I've had this discussion, or witnessed this discussion, someone has said, "You haven't walked around Autzen Stadium wearing (Opposing team colors/logo)".
So if that's what it takes to see how rude Oregon fans can get, that's what I'll have to do.
That's right. I am planning on going to every game next year dressed up as an opposing fan and document and publish my encounters. Hopefully with the help of another person, I'll even be able to capture some of this with a camera. Ideally, I would do this with another fan of the team I am "representing".
While it would cut a bit into my own tailgating, I would walk around the tailgate scene before the game. I won't try to be an antagonist. I'll work to represent the school and the fan base in a positive manner
I'll try to strike up a conversation with a few people, either by asking for directions, or ask about local places to go while I'm "in town".
There are some obstacles I will have to account for however.
I do not plan on cheering for the visiting team while the game is actually going on. I plan on remedying this by having a backpack with some clothes I can swap out. I realize this may not allow me to experience the whole "Autzen" experience, but I do have my loyalties. Convincing myself to wear an opponent's colors is difficult enough.
I don't particularly want to buy clothes for each game. So I'll either be asking for a hand-me-downs, scout craigslist/ebay, or try to borrow some from somebody. If all else fails, I can hopefully get some people to help sponsor my "trips" (All associated costs and fund-raising would be completely open and traceable)
Now a quick look at the home schedule for 2010, in no particular order:
I know nothing about New Mexico, other than they are in the Mountain West and the university is in Albuquerque (Which I learned most about Albuquerque from Bugs Bunny and Weird Al).
As you can see, I have my research to do for New Mexico. What is a Lobo anyway?
Portland State Vikings
Ah... now we are getting to a more familiar territory. Canzano always pimps the PSU program and wants us "Portland Area" folks to support this team. They've been putting some money towards their advertisement campaign.
Why will this be easy for me to wear Portland State gear?
- It's local so it is easy to grab their garb.
- Their head coach has never lost a game at PSU.
- Their head coach has never won a game at PSU.
- I don't mind supporting them, despite Canzano telling me I should.
- And best of all, Nike clearly has an influence on their uniforms.
Why will this be difficult for me to wear Portland State gear?
- My ex is a student there, and I need to find any outlet I can to demonize her... So I'll just say she's studied under Lane Kiffen so she could become a PSU hostess, (That whore!).
- Canzano tells me to support the team.
Why will this be difficult for me to wear UCLA gear?
- What's a Bruin anyway?
- I suspect wearing attire that can be related to Neuheisel could bring the wrath of some Oregon fans.
- Learning to properly spell Neuheisel.
- Avoiding making pedobear jokes.
- We do it better.
Not since Cleveland found its Brown has a color ever been so terrifying. What is really terrifying is the cleat marks of Toby Gerhart.
Why will this be easy for me to wear Stanford gear?
- Red brings out the color in my eyes.
- I'm rather fond of trees.
- People will immediately think I'm smart.
Why will this be difficult for me to wear Stanford gear?
- I'll have to pretend like I'm smart. I'll have to wear glasses or something.
- I'll have to pretend like I don't know what a full stadium looks like.
- I'll represent a significant percentage of their fan base.
So the Wildcats "Bear Down" despite being one of 8 Pac-10 teams without having anything to do with "Bears".
Why will this be easy for me to wear Arizona gear?
- I'll feel patriotic wearing Red, White and Blue. I might even look in the mirror during the Star Spangled Banner.
- I've had 15 years of experience knowing what it is like to not go to the Rose Bowl.
- I'll look "edgy" by saying I think Stoops should be fired.
Why will this be difficult for me to wear Arizona gear?
- I'm know nothing about basketball, which is an Arizona pride.
- I'll feel like an idiot saying "Bear Down".
- Blue makes my butt look big.
Why will this be easy for me to wear Washington gear?
- Because it will be a lot of fun to practice my extreme arrogance? I'm grasping a straws here.
Why will this be difficult for me to wear Washington gear?
- Of all the games on the schedule, this one scares me the most. I've had bad interactions with Husky fans while in the state of Washington.
- In the original SI poll, Washington voted for Oregon by the largest margin.
- I specifically don't own anything purple or gold for a reason.
- The nature of a deep rival hatred, especially when Oregon openly has the greater hate.
In closing, if anyone has any additional ideas to improve this social experiment, or if anyone can provide knowledge as the season approaches, I'll be more than receptive. Also, feedback if this is a "good idea" or a "bad idea" would be encouraged as well.
Please note, any "rude" comment made in this fanpost should be taken as a comment made with tongue-in-cheek.