Tako Tuesdays: Radical Realignment [WITH AN AMENDMENT!]
by Takimoto on Mar 3, 2010 1:44 AM PST
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PrintMarch 1, 2010: The NCAA, in a surprise move, names Addicted to Quack writer Matt Takimoto Chief Executive Czar of Conference Re-Alignment. As the newly appointed CECCR-E, Takimoto starts his plan with a decree:
"Conference ties shall no longer span across sports. Each sport will be determined in an individual basis, and will be named accordingly."
The first step of the reorganization process: football.
Essential componants:
- Relegation is going to happen. So no more complaining about not getting a chance. Shut up and win.
- Non-championship classes will only play each other in a round-robin format. Team with the best record earns promotion. That means that Championship class teams may only only schedule other Championship class teams as non-conference opponents. Schedule-padding? Gone.
- The winners of the conference championship games will be ranked at the annual American College Football Writers Symposium in Las Vegas, NV. The Keynote Speaker will be benzduck. John Canzano can sit at home and stare at his "awards," because he isn't invited. After ranking, the #4 and #5 seeds have a play-in game, and then semifinals and a final.
- If a bowl wants to continue holding its game, it is free to do so without conference affiliation. Bowls will effectively become exhibition games for money and and an opportunity for teams to get an extra month's practice time in. Wait, that's already what bowls are! Man, that's convenient.
- Instead of championship T-shirts, fans will be directed to donate to a charity of the NC winning team's choice. Every losing team will have to donate $5,000. The world does not need new merchandise.
- After ten years, any team that has not spent at least one year at the Championship level will be considered for relegation to Division II. Only teams with D-II national championships will be considered for promotion.
On to the conferences!
I arranged the divisions by ranking the twelve teams in the conference and splitting them up 1-4-5-8-9-12 and 2-3-6-7-10-11. The divisions would be realigned yearly, with the promoted team taking the #12 spot. In the event of relegation ties, a tiebreaker game will be held, with a game of Rock, Paper, Scissors between the two athletic directors deciding home field. Tiebreaker Rock, Paper, Scissors games will be televised on ESPN2.
Pacific Coast Football Conference - Championship Class
Doxey Division
Oregon
Stanford
USC
Washington
UCLA
Nevada
Tillman Division
Arizona
Oregon State
Utah
California
Boise State
Arizona State
Pacific Coast Football Conference - Non-Championship Class
Washington State
Fresno State
Idaho
Utah State
Colorado State
Wyoming
San Jose State
New Mexico
San Diego State
Hawaii
UNLV
New Mexico State
Midwest Football Conference - Championship Class
Hayes Division
Ohio State
Central Michigan
Wisconsin
Purdue
Minnesota
Notre Dame
Schembechler Division
Iowa
Cincinnati
Northwestern
Michigan State
Illinois
Michigan
Midwest Football Conference - Non-Championship Class
Marshall
Ohio
Bowling Green
Kent State
Akron
Miami (OH)
Northern Illinois
Western Michigan
Toledo
Eastern Michigan
Ball State
Indiana
Southeastern Football Conference - Championship Class
Tebow Division
Florida
Miami (FL)
LSU
Mississippi State
Arkansas
Auburn
Bryant Division
Alabama
Florida State
Mississippi
Kentucky
Georgia
Tennessee
Southeastern Football Conference - Non-Championship Class
Troy
Vanderbilt
Southern Miss
Florida Atlantic
Arkansas State
Florida International
UAB
UCFMississippi State Tulane
Western Kentucky
Middle Tennessee State
Memphis
Southwestern Football Conference - Championship Class
Williams Division
Texas
Texas A&M
Oklahoma State
Texas Tech
Kansas State
BYU
Frost Division
Nebraska
Colorado
TCU
Iowa State
Oklahoma
Missouri
Southwestern Football Conference - Non-Championship Class
Baylor
North Texas
Tulsa
UTEP
Houston
SMU
Louisiana-Monroe
Louisiana-Lafayette
Louisiana TechTulane Rice
Air Force
Kansas
Atlantic Coast Football Conference - Championship Class
Flutie Division
Georgia Tech
USF
Clemson
West Virginia
North Carolina
Boston College
Marino Division
Virginia Tech
South Carolina
Pitt
UConn
Rutgers
Penn State
Atlantic Coast Football Conference - Non-Championship Class
Duke
Virginia
Temple
Buffalo
East Carolina
Army
Navy
Louisville
Syracuse
Wake Forest
North Carolina State
Maryland
Entertaining as hell? I think so. If I messed anything up (repeated teams, missed teams, etc...), let me know in the comments and I'll fix it. I'm pretty sure it's right though.
I'm gonna be honest, it's 4 AM and I just don't feel like putting up Keg Stickers. I'll get it done sometime tomorrow and update the post.
Keg Stickers!
Come out from the corner JonathanPDX, here be the Keg Stickarrrrs! I be talking like a pirate today because last week, Jonathan committed Wikipedia piracy! Wikipedia + Canzano = Double Kegger! Congrats Jonathan! I also have yet to give JShufelt a Keg Sticker for his CSI: Miami GIF, and that's a damn shame.
Bill Musgrave
Matt Daddy
Gorbachav5
JonathanPDX
Takimoto
ntrebon
echo31
CaDuck
trumpetduck
Addicted to Quack
QuackinAK
JTLight
benzduck
axemen23
AllSaintsDay
JShufelt
Keg Sticker via www.beerguide.com.au
EDIT, 3.3.10
So benzduck's comment about my taking out Washington State in favor of Nevada got me wondering if I actually got it right, if the best twelve teams from 2009 were in the PCFC Championship Class, and if they were seeded correctly. Was a 7-1 WAC season worth more than a 4-5 Pac-10 season? Naturally, I couldn't do this with conjecture, or even four straight days of NCAA '10 ending in seizures. I needed technology, and the gift to all mankind that is whatifsports.com was a more than serviceable medium. I simulated a full round-robin, starting with games that were actually played in 2009. In the case of any game that did not take place in real life, I simulated a home-and-home series, with a neutral site game serving as the tiebreaker. The results surprised me, and frankly, you aren't going to like them.
Boise State: 23-0
Oregon: 20-3
Oregon State: 19-4
USC: 18-5
Utah: 18-5
Arizona: 17-6
Cal: 16-7
Nevada: 16-7
Stanford: 16-7
Arizona State: 14-9
UCLA: 12-11
Fresno State: 11-12
San Diego State: 11-12
Washington: 11-12
Idaho: 10-13
Wyoming: 8-15
Colorado State: 7-16
Utah State: 6-17
Hawaii: 5-18
UNLV: 5-18
San Jose State: 4-19
New Mexico: 4-19
New Mexico State: 3-20
Washington State: 1-22
So, according to WhatIfSports.com, not only was Boise State ridiculously good (the only teams to take it to a third game were Cal and USC), but Washington State is damn atrocious. Their only win was against New Mexico State. You'll notice there was a tie for the 12th and final Championship Class position. I decided this with a round-robin, best of 7 tourney between Fresno State, Washington, and SDSU. The results:
FSU vs. UW: FSU in 5
FSU vs. SDSU: FSU in 4
SDSU vs. UW: SDSU in 5
Therefore, both Washington teams get relegated, and the divisions look like this:
Simpson Division
Boise St.
USC
Utah
Nevada
Stanford
Fresno St.
Bellotti Division
Oregon
OSU
Arizona
Cal
ASU
UCLA
This is a FanPost and does not necessarily reflect the views of SB Nation or the Addicted To Quack Moderators. FanPost opinions are valued expressions of opinion by passionate and knowledgeable Oregon fans.
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Damn you!
I gave myself insomnia many years ago just so I could be the first one to see Tako Tuesdays. So many years of suffering, and after all that, I find Otter Pops (which is one step away from Beaver Pops) and not a single Keg Sticker?! I’m offended, outraged, shocked, and discombobulated, in that order. AtQ is a serious place and Tako Tuesdays is SERIOUS BUISNESS! Tako Tuesday without Keg Stickers is like Tim Tebow without a TV crew, a bible, and a throng of screaming fans who have no idea he will never be a NFL quarterback. It just doesn’t work.
Until this is fixed you need to go sit in the corner, put on a Jake Locker Iz Gr8 turtleneck, and think about what you’ve done. I’m sorry I had to do this, but you’ll thank me for it someday.
Red!
This shouldn’t even be a discussion. Red is the best flavor.
Only losing THREE starters from the USC game. (Offense and Defense)
Ladies and Gentlemen your 2010-11 Oregon Ducks.
Oregon-Frontrunners for the 2010 Fulmer Cup
by QuackQuackAttack on Mar 2, 2010 4:52 AM PST reply actions 1 recs
Purple, Green, and Blue are equally scrumptious.
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 5:12 AM PST via mobile reply actions
Otter Pops are badass
but, you can’t have Mississippi State in both the championship AND non championship divisions!
--Dave
Addicted to Quack, SBN's Oregon Ducks blog
Of course
one is on Agate Street. The other is on Agate Alley.
--Dave
Addicted to Quack, SBN's Oregon Ducks blog
Fixed. I missed Rice.
It's spelled "C-A-N-Z-A-N-O-S-P-A-R-E-N-T-S-D-O-N-T-B-E-L-I-E-V-E-I-N-H-I-M"
I support Roger Kieschnick in his quest to becoming the best Kieschnick ever to play professional baseball.
Addicted to Quack, the home of Tako Tuesdays
Probably the first time that’s ever happened.
everything is history, eventually.
by benzduck on Mar 2, 2010 10:21 AM PST up reply actions 2 recs
An asian joke? Really? I’d be offended if it wasn’t completely accurate, and I got offended by that kind of thing.
It's spelled "C-A-N-Z-A-N-O-S-P-A-R-E-N-T-S-D-O-N-T-B-E-L-I-E-V-E-I-N-H-I-M"
I support Roger Kieschnick in his quest to becoming the best Kieschnick ever to play professional baseball.
Addicted to Quack, the home of Tako Tuesdays
Hmm, I did not interpret it that way at all — I took it as the first time anyone has missed Rice’s football program.
My PC feelers are out there,
but the first thing that sprung to mind was ‘Asian joke’ even though I’m almost certain it isn’t.
Does that make me
a) a good person
b) a bad person
by HoodRiverDuck on Mar 2, 2010 10:39 AM PST up reply actions
You are a bad person.
Sincerely,
Bad Person
s-panic = σ – ⅓ (σx+σy+σz) I
by Bill Musgrave on Mar 2, 2010 6:20 PM PST up reply actions
Oops. Twenty-three years of asian jokes will do that. My bad if I took it the wrong way, I wasn’t bothered by it either way.
It's spelled "C-A-N-Z-A-N-O-S-P-A-R-E-N-T-S-D-O-N-T-B-E-L-I-E-V-E-I-N-H-I-M"
I support Roger Kieschnick in his quest to becoming the best Kieschnick ever to play professional baseball.
Addicted to Quack, the home of Tako Tuesdays
Hahahahaha.
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 10:44 AM PST via mobile up reply actions
Yooou sonofabitch…
It's spelled "C-A-N-Z-A-N-O-S-P-A-R-E-N-T-S-D-O-N-T-B-E-L-I-E-V-E-I-N-H-I-M"
I support Roger Kieschnick in his quest to becoming the best Kieschnick ever to play professional baseball.
Addicted to Quack, the home of Tako Tuesdays
This blog seems to be good at forgetting staples of a nourishing diet
Right Jshufelt?
Innocent until proven guilty.
Green
All colors pale in comparison to the almighty color of GREEN!!!! And whoever selects purple, here is your link
Well Canzano, maybe your parents didn’t believe in you.
Addicted to Quack
Green is the best. Blue, purple, then red.
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 9:14 AM PST via mobile reply actions
Wait a second
You agree with me?!? This could have the same devastating effects as if Tako and The Impact were in the same room!
Innocent until proven guilty.
This is unsettling, indeed.
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 9:34 AM PST via mobile up reply actions
This is unsettling, indeed.
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 9:34 AM PST via mobile up reply actions
Yeah, my posts go wack when I'm on my iPod.
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 9:55 AM PST via mobile up reply actions
I love the idea of relegation. That would make things awesome.
--AddictedToQuack, SBNation's Oregon Ducks blog
This is my single favorite thing about European soccer leagues. It makes so many more games really meaningful through the whole season.
by HoodRiverDuck on Mar 2, 2010 10:09 AM PST up reply actions
It’s much more necessary in the NBA or NFL with teams tanking. But it would definitely add a nice touch to college football, and really give the little guys a chance, or make them think they have a chance (they don’t have a chance).
--AddictedToQuack, SBNation's Oregon Ducks blog
It’s true. I could stand with not seeing Kansas City and Washington playing god-awful baseball.
Defending maligned chants since 2009
I’m ready for a Eugene Emeralds-Tennessee Smokies world series.
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 12:21 PM PST via mobile up reply actions 1 recs
Well, OK.
If we’re just throwing them in a bag and ranking based on recent performance, OK. But I’d still give a preferred rank, at least initially, to a team with a bad record in a good conference over a team with a good record in a bad conference (also see: Central Michigan > Indiana?).
In a few years, the realignment thingie will shake itself out.
everything is history, eventually.
Think about this: how much better would the 2008 Crapple Cup be if relegation were on the line?
It's spelled "C-A-N-Z-A-N-O-S-P-A-R-E-N-T-S-D-O-N-T-B-E-L-I-E-V-E-I-N-H-I-M"
I support Roger Kieschnick in his quest to becoming the best Kieschnick ever to play professional baseball.
Addicted to Quack, the home of Tako Tuesdays
Man, I love it when you reply fail to my posts.
by HoodRiverDuck on Mar 2, 2010 3:26 PM PST up reply actions
hey stop picking on the elderly
Well Canzano, maybe your parents didn’t believe in you.
Addicted to Quack
I think we all know who voted for the "what the heck is an otter pop" category.
This off-season officially sucks for FIVE reasons and counting...
That was me
I was having a massive brain fart in Newspaper this morning.
Innocent until proven guilty.
I blame Google Chrome. Or SBnation, or whoever it is who coded this mess.
everything is history, eventually.
BLAME AL GORE!
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 4:21 PM PST up reply actions
Nevada??
You’re out of your freakin’ mind (i know, thank you Captain Obvious).
Sure.Wazzu is going through a down cycle, but they’ve still been to more Rose Bowls in the last 12 years than Arizona, Cal and OSU in the last 50 years, combined.
And what exactly has Nevada done to merit inclusion in the “championship class”? I think you’re feeling guilty about something and this is your way of making it up to someone.
everything is history, eventually.
I ranked the teams based purely on 2010 results. This is kicking tradition to the curb, so I tried not to hold allegiances based on history. I know it’s exactly the opposite of your forte, so I’ll get off your lawn. I also knocked down teams like Baylor, Air Force, Kansas, and Indiana, and probably should have switched Ohio and Michigan. I’m simply valuing a 7-1 WAC season over an 0-9 Pac-10 season.
It's spelled "C-A-N-Z-A-N-O-S-P-A-R-E-N-T-S-D-O-N-T-B-E-L-I-E-V-E-I-N-H-I-M"
I support Roger Kieschnick in his quest to becoming the best Kieschnick ever to play professional baseball.
Addicted to Quack, the home of Tako Tuesdays
KEG STICKERS TAPPED!
It's spelled "C-A-N-Z-A-N-O-S-P-A-R-E-N-T-S-D-O-N-T-B-E-L-I-E-V-E-I-N-H-I-M"
I support Roger Kieschnick in his quest to becoming the best Kieschnick ever to play professional baseball.
Addicted to Quack, the home of Tako Tuesdays
What are the guidelines for recieving Keg Stickers?
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 11:23 AM PST via mobile reply actions
Also,
they aren’t given out for reply fails.
by HoodRiverDuck on Mar 2, 2010 11:28 AM PST up reply actions
Take away CaDuck and axemen's, then.
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 11:33 AM PST via mobile up reply actions
I REFUSE TO ALLOW, TOLERATE, OR PROMOTE UNDERAGE DRINKING!
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 3:56 PM PST up reply actions
It’s spelled “S-H-U-R-A-N-A-L-C-O-H-O-L-I-C!”
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 4:07 PM PST up reply actions
Dude.
WTF is an “anal coholic”?
ATQ, guaranteed to turn homoerotic or your money back.
This off-season officially sucks for FIVE reasons and counting...
Your Anal Coholic?
Or You’re an alcoholic?
Take your pick.
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 4:24 PM PST up reply actions
Anal Bum Covers?
Only losing THREE starters from the USC game. (Offense and Defense)
Ladies and Gentlemen your 2010-11 Oregon Ducks.
Oregon-Frontrunners for the 2010 Fulmer Cup
by QuackQuackAttack on Mar 2, 2010 5:51 PM PST up reply actions
Then again,
criminal activity is a prerequisite to Duck fandom.
by HoodRiverDuck on Mar 2, 2010 12:43 PM PST up reply actions
Underage kegs are filled with root beer.
It's spelled "C-A-N-Z-A-N-O-S-P-A-R-E-N-T-S-D-O-N-T-B-E-L-I-E-V-E-I-N-H-I-M"
I support Roger Kieschnick in his quest to becoming the best Kieschnick ever to play professional baseball.
Addicted to Quack, the home of Tako Tuesdays
No.
It's spelled "C-A-N-Z-A-N-O-S-P-A-R-E-N-T-S-D-O-N-T-B-E-L-I-E-V-E-I-N-H-I-M"
I support Roger Kieschnick in his quest to becoming the best Kieschnick ever to play professional baseball.
Addicted to Quack, the home of Tako Tuesdays
The guidelines for receiving a Keg Sticker are: Do something Keg Sticker-worthy, and that’s it.
It's spelled "C-A-N-Z-A-N-O-S-P-A-R-E-N-T-S-D-O-N-T-B-E-L-I-E-V-E-I-N-H-I-M"
I support Roger Kieschnick in his quest to becoming the best Kieschnick ever to play professional baseball.
Addicted to Quack, the home of Tako Tuesdays
So axemen got one for not being here? :)
Seems fair enough, i just had no idea what they were for
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 12:58 PM PST via mobile up reply actions
I think it’s collective of all keg stickers since Takimoto started to hand them out.
its spelled "S-H-U-F-E-L-T-N-O-B-A-L-L-S"
Ah, ok.
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 2:25 PM PST up reply actions
Bill Musgrave is in hiding after ordering his Army of Eddie Pleasants to perform Code Reds on the entire football team for their disgraceful acts last month.
Right now Bill is somewhere in Cuba surrounded by Eddie Pleasants sworn to protect him from anybody dressed in a faggoty white uniform and a Harvard mouth
Well Canzano, maybe your parents didn’t believe in you.
Addicted to Quack
Yes
s-panic = σ – ⅓ (σx+σy+σz) I
by Bill Musgrave on Mar 2, 2010 6:23 PM PST up reply actions
Bill
Seriously, what did you do to get exiled to Honduras? On second thought, don’t tell me, it must have been pretty bad and I don’t want to get in trouble with you.
Well Canzano, maybe your parents didn’t believe in you.
Addicted to Quack
Could be worse.
He could be in British Honduras. (OK, it’s Belize now, but it’s still a shithole.)
Aldous Huxley wrote: “If the world had any ends, British Honduras would almost certainly be one of them.”
everything is history, eventually.
Jack Ryan called in BA Barrackas, Ollie North, Chiquita Banana, Carl Weathers, and I for a special UO recruiting trip.
We don’t all see eye to eye politically but at least everyone can agree to fight to the death for Los Patos.
s-panic = σ – ⅓ (σx+σy+σz) I
by Bill Musgrave on Mar 3, 2010 3:00 PM PST via mobile up reply actions
Actually, Jeremy (Bill Musgrave) is in Honduras.
Addicted To Quack [dot] com
I have a Ropert is God™ complex.
Stop, you're ruining the great story!
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 3:23 PM PST up reply actions
Honduras is more exciting than Cuba.
They’re toppling the government, what better place for the Pleasant Army to intervene.
by HoodRiverDuck on Mar 2, 2010 3:27 PM PST up reply actions
Esta el en Tegucigalpa?
^
Greatest name for a capital city in the world.
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 3:28 PM PST up reply actions
This post comes from San Pedro Sula, Honduras
And the first computer I’ve seen in almost 2 weeks.
Cool, I push these buttons and letters spit out.
My band of rebel Eddie’s and I have been rounding up all the otter pops of the world. They suck without refrigeration.
s-panic = σ – ⅓ (σx+σy+σz) I
by Bill Musgrave on Mar 2, 2010 6:26 PM PST up reply actions
PS:
Are The Michael and The Masoli in jail, and do we have a whole new team?
Is Ernie Kent head janitor yet?
s-panic = σ – ⅓ (σx+σy+σz) I
by Bill Musgrave on Mar 2, 2010 6:29 PM PST up reply actions
No, no, and no.
The last one, sadly.
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 6:34 PM PST up reply actions
Musgrave got a 3 sticker head start for winning the 2009 Tako Tuesdays Drunk of the Year award.
It's spelled "C-A-N-Z-A-N-O-S-P-A-R-E-N-T-S-D-O-N-T-B-E-L-I-E-V-E-I-N-H-I-M"
I support Roger Kieschnick in his quest to becoming the best Kieschnick ever to play professional baseball.
Addicted to Quack, the home of Tako Tuesdays
Hiccup
s-panic = σ – ⅓ (σx+σy+σz) I
by Bill Musgrave on Mar 2, 2010 6:24 PM PST up reply actions
I think considering Bill Musgrave convinced his Army of Eddie’s to let him log on to a computer in the heart of the Honduras jungle just so he could read a Tako Tuesday, he deserves another keg sticker.
Also, I’m sure he was drinking a Dos Equis, making Bill the most interesting man in the world.
Well Canzano, maybe your parents didn’t believe in you.
Addicted to Quack
He can speak Russian...in French.
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 8:54 PM PST up reply actions
In Honduras, the A-Team and I drink Salva Vida
And an occasional Monkey-La-La, regardless of how embarassing it is to order that, it taste GOOOOOD.
s-panic = σ – ⅓ (σx+σy+σz) I
by Bill Musgrave on Mar 3, 2010 6:37 PM PST up reply actions
I'll need a topic for the keynote speech.
Trying to decide between:
1 — “College Football Before 1994: Did It Exist? The Historical Evidence”
2 — “The Effect Of Youthful Lassitude, PBR-Based Urine, and Empty Red Vines Packaging on Poa pratensis”
3 — “A Review of Disputes Concerning The Orientation Of Agate Street And Its Alley”
Other suggestions welcome.
everything is history, eventually.
Hmmm,
A topic I would suggest would be, “Not only is your opinion wrong, it is also porn”.
This off-season officially sucks for FIVE reasons and counting...
OK, but that's not a topic.
A topic would be something like, “Best Practices in Analyzing The Porn Level of Opinions”.
everything is history, eventually.
"Best Practices in Analyzing The Porn Level of Opinions".
by HoodRiverDuck on Mar 2, 2010 5:03 PM PST up reply actions
You could sure make a speech entitled and relating to what I wrote.
This off-season officially sucks for FIVE reasons and counting...
Here's my suggestion
Why you love Ernie Kent.
Speech will last roughly 2 seconds, and then you’re out. Thank me later.
Well Canzano, maybe your parents didn’t believe in you.
Addicted to Quack
Avast ye scurvy dogs!
You land lubbers, scallywags, and mutinous privateers best be wary. Me crew ‘o scoundrals be castin’ off on a voyage ‘o pure evil. Me first mate be a fellow so foul his own hair ran straight off ’is head and took on work with an English trawler just to get out ’o the same sea as us. We call him ’the orphan’ on account ’o his parents who never believed in him; heck even the most rotten pirate still has a mum back on the mainland!
Otter pops are the greatest thing ever after playing some pickup basketball or wiffle ball in the 95 degree humid summer heat.
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 9:10 PM PST reply actions
NO
Otter pops Frozen Gatorades are the greatest thing ever after playing some pickup basketball or wiffle ball in the 95 degree humid summer heat.
Innocent until proven guilty.
You wouldn't know.
There is no such thing as “95 degree humid summer heat” in Eugene
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 9:17 PM PST up reply actions
95 degrees? yes. humid comparable to tennessee? probably not.
It's spelled "C-A-N-Z-A-N-O-S-P-A-R-E-N-T-S-D-O-N-T-B-E-L-I-E-V-E-I-N-H-I-M"
I support Roger Kieschnick in his quest to becoming the best Kieschnick ever to play professional baseball.
Addicted to Quack, the home of Tako Tuesdays
Compared to Tennessee, of course there's no contest.
But it certainly hits 95 degrees in Eugene regularly in July, and I would call it humid as well.
Addicted To Quack [dot] com
I have a Ropert is God™ complex.
It’s not really humid relative to other places around the country. It’s certainly hot and it gets a little more humid than is normal for Eugene, but if you compared to most other places (especially the South), it’s not humid.
Defending maligned chants since 2009
Well, “humidity” is relative. I would say Eugene never gets humid.
Defending maligned chants since 2009
Yup. Even in Colorado, it gets more humid during the summer time.
75-80 and humid felt like 90+.
We in the northwest have it pretty comfortable during the summer time compared to the rest of the country.
its spelled "S-H-U-F-E-L-T-N-O-B-A-L-L-S"
Yes, you do. Very lucky.
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 3, 2010 6:28 PM PST up reply actions
That’s our summer every year, times 2.
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 3, 2010 3:20 PM PST up reply actions
Clearly you have never been down Agate alley.
This off-season officially sucks for FIVE reasons and counting...
Let's get bitchy with me, guys.
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 9:20 PM PST up reply actions
Insert something about Chris Johnson's 40 time here?
Just kidding.
This off-season officially sucks for FIVE reasons and counting...
Ok, you're beating the dead horse.
Oregon Duck Football-Your Frontrunner for the 2010 Fulmer Cup.
by TennesseeQuackAttack8 on Mar 2, 2010 9:37 PM PST up reply actions
Isn't that what we always do on ATQ?
This off-season officially sucks for FIVE reasons and counting...
Sometimes we beat the dead Husky
Tracy Porter's gonna score! TRACY PORTER'S GONNA SCORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (HT Takimoto)
Realignment
It’s fun to think about, but when you look at the current state of the BCS and NCAA it doesn’t look so good going forward. I think realignment would simply come via sponsorships, we’d have the Frito Lay conferance playing against the Verizon Wireless division in the PediaSure Bowl. There won’t even be a trophy anymore, no bragging rights, no Rose Bowl, they won’t even try to paint over this corporate shell with some old school college fanfare.
When the ratings drop because nobody is playing for anything but ad revenue we’ll get TV tie ins. Now it’s the Ohio State Buckeyes featuring Dancing With The Stars contestant Carrot Top (playing Quarterback) vs. the Oregon Ducks featuring Jay Leno (at halfback) to promote his new improv comedy show, airing at 2:30 AM. It will be a Pepto Bismol Bowl for the ages.
Fuck Jay Leno.
It's spelled "C-A-N-Z-A-N-O-S-P-A-R-E-N-T-S-D-O-N-T-B-E-L-I-E-V-E-I-N-H-I-M"
I support Roger Kieschnick in his quest to becoming the best Kieschnick ever to play professional baseball.
Addicted to Quack, the home of Tako Tuesdays
by Takimoto on Mar 3, 2010 12:08 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs
So you're telling me as bad as we were...
We still couldn’t pull a UW and go winless? Even in a simulation? Time to pop the champagne bottles!
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