Tako Tuesdays is Gonna Jinx Everything

Ezra Shaw

And it isn't gonna mean anything.

Oregon's gonna win on Thursday night.

They're gonna beat Stanford, and it's gonna look easier than we all expect.

The Ducks are going to beat every remaining opponent on their schedule, and they're gonna do it handily.

Oregon is going to the national championship game.


Who's freaked the hell out now? Is it you? Are you freaked the hell out? You shouldn't be. Because, and this may come as a bit of a shock so be prepared, I don't have magical powers that hold any sway whatsoever on the Oregon football team. Oregon is a better football team than Stanford. It isn't a huge margin, but it's definitely there. They don't need my help to win on Thursday, and they certainly don't give a shit about my prognostication. Here's some more stuff to think about!

  • In their last five games at Stanford Stadium, Oregon is 4-1, and is averaging 45.8 points per game. The only loss was a 51-42 shootout loss in 2009, and Toby Gerhart and Andrew Luck are not walking through that door for the Cardinal, nor is Oregon's defense imploding to the point of giving up 50+.
  • The last Pac-12 opponent to beat Oregon two seasons in a row? Cal, in 2007 and 2008.
  • Stanford lost to Utah. Like, less than a month ago.
  • Stanford defensive end Ben Gardner was lost for the season to a torn pectoral injury. Losing the guy who leads your front four in tackles for loss and sacks is not a good thing to do when playing Oregon.
  • The last time Oregon beat UCLA, and then had more than a week off to prepare for their next game, they scored 45 points and won the Rose Bowl. The Ducks can't win the Rose Bowl this Thursday, but they can score 45.
  • Oregon is undefeated in Thursday night games since 2010, winning by an average score of 48-16.
  • Did I mention that Stanford lost to Utah? Like, less than a month ago. That really happened.
  • In 2012, Will Murphy accounted for 10% of Oregon's receptions, Bralon Addison did not have a catch, and Marcus Mariota averaged 5.6 yards per pass attempt. I will personally guarantee that none of these three things will happen again.
  • If anything, Oregon comes into this game stronger than what we expected at the beginning of the year. With the emergence of Byron Marshall, a healthy De'Anthony Thomas can be more diversely utilized, similar to what we saw in 2011 or 2012.
  • Andrew Luck won his first start against Oregon. He lost his next two. Kevin Hogan won his first start against Oregon.
  • Stanford ranks 98th in the country with 193 passing yards per game. Oregon hasn't lost when an opponent throws for 193 or fewer yards since LSU in 2011, when Zach Lee threw for only 98 yards. Oregon has only three such losses since 2007 (Cal 2008, UCLA 2007 are the other two.)
Lastly, and maybe the most foolproof reason for Oregon's victory is this. I haven't watched an Oregon football loss in person since Boise State in 2009. I'll be at Stanford Stadium on Thursday night.

Hey, maybe I do have magical powers.
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