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Brother v. Brother: A Heisman on loan, those chic-y Ducks, and some bowl season appetizers are served

Where's my highlighter? Oh, <em>there</em> it is.
Where's my highlighter? Oh, there it is.

Everyone has an arch nemesis. Mine just happens to be my older brother. But our incessant bickering has led to many an entertaining discussion through the years. And because much of these debates have centered on college sports, it seems only appropriate we take them to the blogosphere to settle them once and for all. Here's your weekly brotherly debate, affectionately known as Sh*t My Brother Says.

PaulSF: I can't believe, after nearly a year, you're still trying to decide between the XBox 360 and the PlayStation 3. Seriously? You could have logged like a bajillion hours of Black Ops by now!

GrumpyJDH: Maybe if I didn't have a career, a second career, a daughter to take care of, a house to know, a life. Besides, who needs a console when you can play Angry Birds on your phone anytime you want (read: all day)? So much for those careers, I guess.

PaulSF: Holy smokes! Did Big Bro just reference a smartphone game? I'm shocked you even own a smartphone. No offense, but you seem like more of a feature phone guy. Or maybe even a burner guy. In other words, you're old.

GrumpyJDH: Easy there, McNulty. I'm not a complete Luddite...nor a drug dealer.

PaulSF: Okay, maybe not a burner guy, but definitely not an iPhone guy like me.

GrumpyJDH: If by "iPhone guy," you mean "douchebag," then no, I'm not. I'm all Android, baby. Besides, iPhones are overrated.

PaulSF: Wanna know what else is overrated? The Heisman Trophy. For nearly a century, the award has been handed out to the most outstanding college football player. And it was again last Saturday evening. But there's no doubt the award has lost its luster. We both agree Cam Newton deserved it, but following the Reggie Bush debacle, (1) did his win taint the trophy for the second time in less than a year?

GrumpyJDH: Absolutely, though it doesn't appear many voters were swayed by the cloud of allegations hovering over him. Perhaps they felt morally immune from any future ramifications? After all, the kid is still eligible. Nevertheless, the mission statement clearly emphasizes integrity and amateurism, two things the Newtons probably compromised. I was surprised, quite frankly, that more voters didn't shy away to avoid future controversy. Of course, the real travesty is that our own guy was trumped for second place by a guy whom he totally outclassed in a head-to-head matchup earlier this season.

PaulSF: LaMichael James clearly got dinged by his offseason incident. Think about it. Newton had 729 first-place votes, Andrew Luck had 78, and James had 22. Anyone who considered the Newton allegations likely chose Luck, not James, as LaMike had an "incident" of his own. Fair? No. But I think, overall, the voters got it right...for now. That trophy's coming back, though. Hopefully not before January 10, 2011. I want to beat Auburn with Newton. It'll be that much sweeter.

GrumpyJDH: It most certainly will be, Paully, and since we have plenty of time to talk Cam in the next four weeks, let's get to something more pressing: (2) What did you think of the big unveil on Tuesday? Did Nike hit a homerun or should I take my (admittedly puny) nest egg & invest in a new pair of shades?

PaulSF: Homerun? No, but I do like the new look. More than the look itself, however, I like our tradition. Yeah, you heard me right, Penn State and Ohio State fans. I'm using the "T" word to describe our ever-changing uniform combinations. Why? Because we've changed them so many times now that it has become an Oregon tradition. It's unique. It's innovative. And both adjectives aptly describe the current state of the Oregon football program, in general. Plus, I love hearing the rest of the country bitch and moan about them.

GrumpyJDH: It's called jealousy, Paully, and some folks — I'm talking to you, Bieber Believers — just don't hide it very well. I was pretty slow to embrace our "fashion plate" era, but I've definitely come around. The uniforms have created buzz for the program, are a hit on the recruiting trail, and look downright modern/snazzy most of the time. That said, this (the BCS combo) may not be one of those times. I get the concept and truly appreciate the creative energy spent on our favorite sons. It's just...well, they deserve better than fluorescent socks. Go crazy, think outside the box, reinvent the very idea of a football uniform, but...stick to a traditional palette, for chrissakes!

PaulSF: This is where our age difference shows, Joe, because the only thing I really like about the new look is the cleats/socks combo. And no, they don't remind me of the Seahawks. The idea behind the new look, by the way, is to turn the Ducks into a blur...literally. Of course, I trust the folks at Nike probably know what they're doing and, as I said before, I've embraced this tradition. Meanwhile, it sounds like the Big Ten is taking a dump on theirs. The new logo is passable, but "Legends" and "Leaders" for division names? Apparently the ACC taught us nothing. (3) What are your thoughts on the Big Ten's rebrand? Is it fair to say it's somewhat of a reaction to the Pac-10's recent maneuvering?

GrumpyJDH: I'm still trying to figure out why they're calling it the Big 10 after a mere 17 years of fielding 11 institutions. And now they're going to add a 12th? I didn't major in math, but.... How about we just drop "Big" altogether, guys (all conferences are big now), and come up with something original? Those division names, meanwhile, remind me of the "Hops" and "Barley" restrooms at the Rogue Public House in the Rose City. I figured it was a 50/50 shot. Thankfully, I guessed right.

PaulSF: Hey, take it easy on Rogue. The founders are Ducks. I don't know that the Big 10 had many options since the divisions weren't aligned by geography, but they certainly could have come up with something better than those two. Moving on to brighter ideas, you hear Mark Cuban has plans to overhaul the BCS with a playoff system? We've been screwed by the current system before, but now that the Ducks are safely in the title game, (4) do you think the BCS still needs fixing? Or is a playoff the only legitimate way to determine a national champion?

GrumpyJDH: I was almost intrigued until you said "Mark Cuban." No way the head Maverick gets it done. He may have boatloads of dough but he carries basically no clout with the sporting world's shot callers...especially not when the NCAA and BCS powers-that-be won't even admit they have a problem. Here's new Pac-10 Commissioner Larry Scott, on the subject: "We could get a lot more money tomorrow from lots of folks by moving to an expansive playoff; this is about a broader set of priorities benefiting schools and student-athletes." Didn't take Mr. Scott long to start guzzling the BCS Kool-Aid, did it? To answer your question, of course I still want a playoff system. Is there any self-respecting college football fan in this country who doesn't?

PaulSF: No. If you love college football, then you'd love a playoff. Period. I'm definitely all for it and would get on Cuban's bandwagon if his initiative gains steam. You know who else should get involved? Phil Knight, especially right now with the nation watching. How huge would it be if the chief benefactor of one of the two teams playing for the BCS title announces his support for an anti-BCS plan? C'mon, Uncle Phil! Break out that checkbook (again)!

GrumpyJDH: Just too bad we're always talking about the non-football stuff when we talk college football, huh? Hey, I've got an idea. Let's talk some football! I'm filling out my Bowl Bonanza entry and there are five days between now and the next time we talk. (5) Who do you like in the New Mexico, Humanitarian, New Orleans, St. Pete's, and Vegas bowls? No, I'm not even remotely joking. I'll watch (at least parts of) every one.

PaulSF: You don't have a gaming console, so what else are you going to do? My picks: BYU, Fresno State, Ohio, The Ville and Brotzman State. The only real tossup in the mix is Fresno State/NIU. I like the Bulldogs in Boise.

GrumpyJDH: It's bowl season, Paully. They're all toss-ups. BYU in a close one, Ohio by a touch or so, and Louisville/Boise by a couple scores. Fresno drops another one on the blue turf to a ticked off Northern Illinois squad. If you're scoring at home, that's UTEP +11.5, NIU -1.5, Ohio +3, Louisville -3, and Utah +17.5. But what do I know?

PaulSF: Joe, do you have a gambling problem? I guess that's better than a drinking problem. Let's wrap this baby up with a bonus question. Let's say, hypothetically, you're going to attend the national title game. What are you wearing? I'm wearing this. Or this.

GrumpyJDH: I'll be the guy rockin' the ear-to-ear smile, Paully. Ducks!

PaulSF: Touché. DUCKS! Well, that about does 'er. If anyone has any topics they want covered next week, leave them in the comments. Otherwise, we'll just ramble on. Again.