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Quack Fix 11-24-17: Black Friday Edition

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NCAA Basketball: Connecticut at Oregon Joseph Weiser-USA TODAY Sports

When Black Friday comes

I fly down to Muswellbrook

Gonna strike all the big red words

From my little black book

Gonna do just what I please

Gonna wear no socks and shoes

With nothing to do but feed

All the kangaroos

When Black Friday comes I'll be on that hill

You know I will

When Black Friday comes

I'm gonna dig myself a hole

Gonna lay down in it 'til

I satisfy my soul

Gonna let the world pass by me

The Archbishop's gonna sanctify me

And if he don't come across

I'm gonna let it roll

When Black Friday comes

I'm gonna stake my claim

I guess I'll change my name*

*yeah, I know, Fagen and Becker weren’t writing about the biggest retail clusterfuck in the history of Mankind here, but that’s the song playing in my head this morning when I awoke.

Okay, so apparently Akili is Curling, or Tobogganing, or whatever it is you snowbunnies do when that nasty frozen white stuff falls to the ground, so I figured SOMEBODY better post a Fix before the unwashed masses rioted.

Last night Oregon’s Mens’ Basketball played their introductory game at Uncle Phil’s Birthday Party, aka the PK80, in Portland against the UConn huskies, dropping a sloppy and foul-filled game 71-63. Hope someone got those refs some Chapstick, no doubt their lips are sore from blowing their damn whistles, as the two teams managed to rack-up 53 (yes, FIFTY-THREE) personal fouls between them.

And for those of you living under a rock or in a tent in the wilderness, tomorrow the 121st Civil War between Oregon and Oregon State is set for a 4:00 PM kickoff from Autzen Stadium. The current line has Oregon as a 24.5 point favorite.

Something to put a smile on your faces today while you’re out there braving the crowds, fighting for those bargains:

Be nice to one another. GO DUCKS.