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Addicted to Quack Realigns College Football, Part 4

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Everyone leaves town, and we limp to a sad and unsatisfying finish. So, just like your wedding night.

NCAA Football: D1 Football Championship Tim Heitman-USA TODAY Sports

Welcome to Part 4 of our great offseason thought experiment. In case you missed Parts 1-3 (and of course you did, because they happened like two months ago), you can find them here. PART 1, PART 2, and PART 3.

Eight down, four to go. We were rolling through the draft at a steady pace. Readers were happy. Writers were happy.

That was almost a month ago.

What took so long, you may ask? Well, the easy thing to do would be to blame Rusty Ryan for leaving the country for ten days and killing any semblance of momentum we had. So let’s do that. RUSTY SUCKS!

Also, most of the interesting and exciting teams were off the board a bunch of rounds ago, so it isn’t like any of us were itching to jump on the email thread and snatch up a coveted jewel. When UConn, Rice, and Wake Forest are among the most notable teams available, there tends to be a significant lack of gusto. However, we persevered, and we made it to the end. Let’s get back to the action. Here’s where the conferences stand after eight rounds:

Tony Piraro’s SEC: Alabama, Washington, Louisville, Tennessee, Boise State, Kansas State, Northwestern, and South Florida

Akili’s Heel’s ACC: Oregon, Stanford, Auburn, South Carolina, TCU, North Dakota, Utah, and Toledo

hoodriverduck’s MAC: Washington State, Texas Tech, Western Kentucky, San Diego State, Wyoming, Western Michigan, Bowling Green, and Louisiana Tech

doubleduck’s Sun Belt: USC, Penn State, Texas A&M, Nebraska, Houston, Pitt, Missouri, and Fresno State

AJR_425’s Big Ten: Ohio State, LSU, Oklahoma State, Michigan State, Arkansas, Virginia, Iowa, and Purdue

David Piper’s American Conference: Michigan, Florida, Georgia, Arizona State, Central Florida, Cal, North Carolina, and Cincinnati

Sean Goodbody’s Mountain West: Wisconsin, Florida State, Virginia Tech, West Virginia, Iowa State, Colorado State, Kansas, and Kentucky

Matt Takimoto’s Big XII: Miami, Oklahoma, Colorado, Ole Miss, Tulane, Minnesota, Memphis, and Syracuse

Rusty Ryan’s Conference USA: Texas, UCLA, Hawaii, UNLV, Vanderbilt, Georgia Tech, Arizona, and Boston College

Sean Larson’s Pac-12: Notre Dame, Clemson, Army, Navy, Maryland, Duke, Central Michigan, and Appalachian State

Round 9, here we go!


Round 9, Pick #81 - Tony Piraro I lived in North Carolina for a year and honestly the only place I could tolerate was NORTH CAROLINA STATE in Raleigh. Chapel Hill is soaked with khaki-loving snobs. Durham is a hole in the earth, with a campus personality to boot. Winston-Salem needs CP3 to return to make them relevant again. And Charlotte has Cam, who is a few meltdowns away from joining Romo in the booth. I want this Wolfpack to roam free in the SEC...

HRD: HEY AKILI, WESTERN KENTUCKY IS STILL OFF THE BOARD

Akili’s Heel: Pretty sure I remember South Florida being drafted already too.

HRD: Florida, FSU, UCF, Miami Yes. USF? Noope.

Tako: If only there was a document we were using to keep track of all the picks...

Akili: Am I supposed to look at that thing before I comment? I say nay sir, nay!

HRD: I STRONGLY PREDICT AKILI TAKES AIR FORCE

#82 - Akili’s Heel: Goddamn doctor can't figure out reply all, then I reply only to him. I did take Air Force.

#83 - hoodriverduck: He thinks I wasn't just stalking him specifically, it's kind of adorable.

OK, so far the Motherfucking Awesome Rivalry Week looks like this:

  • WSU vs TTU in the Five Hookers Fistfight
  • Wyoming vs. Western Michigan in the Turd Bowl
  • WKU vs BGSU in the Bowling Green Massacre.

Leaving SDSU and La Tech in need of a made-up hatred for a large group of people that they're fairly similar to in reality. Also, although I didn't include it in my mission statement, clearly the MAC has a strong public bias, because the private endowed universities of the football world should really just be sticking to D1 squash and forensics and whatever else spoiled rich kids grow up to do.

I'll start with SDSU. San Diego is known for many things, but mostly it's known for the best weather on the planet. So what public uni with a D1 football program has the absolute worst weather on the planet? And will ensure the MAC pisses it's massive branding footprint pheromones all over this great nation of ours? The MAC really had to Google the fuck out of this choice.

We'll take the University AT Buffalo and their Bulls, which as an added bonus are perhaps the truly historically worst major college football program in history. And it'll be SDSU vs Buffalo in the Marine Layer Lake Effect Classic.

Akili: FWIW, service academies are an undeniably great part of college football. Air Force is a consistently solid program, and stadiums at absurd altitudes are awesome.

HRD: Also, the Marine Layer Lake Effect Classic has just named its primary sponsor as The Weather Channel, with the attendant name change:

The Weather Channel Marine Layer Lake Effect Classic. Where the tailgate scene is so so pitted, bruh.

#84 - doubleduck: Well, the Sun Belt already took Penn State. And, we've already got twice as many Texas schools as any other conference, with Texas A&M and Houston on board. So, might as well solidify that Texas recruiting base and the status of the Conference as the evil empire by drafting the most tone-deaf school in the NCAA. Welcome to the Sun Belt, Baylor. You best clean up your act and avoid the death penalty, damnit.

Akili: You just stole my finale asshole. I planned to draft Baylor in the final round and immediately suspend all football activities indefinitely. This was a great wrong of college football that needed to be corrected.

I was a little worried Tony would take them first, but not anyone else.

doubleduck: washington should have gone dead last or undrafted. Wazzu should never have been taken in the first round. Tako didn't draft Cal. Expect the unexpected, Ass Clown Conference.

Akili: I don't xpect Tony to do stupid things like take Alabama and Uw with his first two picks. I expect HRD to do crazy things, I didn't expect anyone else to draft Predator U.

Akili: Goddam auto correct. I do expect tony to do those things.

Tako: Why is "xpect" part of your autocorrect arsenal?

Akili: That's an excellent question I don't have an answer to.

#85 - Alex Rider: Located in the heart of Philadelphia, this school screams toughness. Getting better at football and solid at basketball. Going with the Temple Owls.

HRD: Big Jell-O Pudding Pop fan, eh?

#86 - David Piper: We have reached the point in the draft where you can take a risk in a program that isn't much now, but has a lot of potential. This school is large, with almost 30,000 students, in a football crazy state. That tells me that the potential to build is there. It also gives fans a fantastic city to visit and access to a fertile Texas recruiting ground. Also, you can't have REAL MURICA without Texas. Welcome to the AAC, UT-San Antonio.

Tako: Dave noooooooooooooooooooooooooo that was my next pick, you jerk!

#87 - Sean Goodbody: Roadrunners were on my draft board as well. Solid pick. Give me the New Mexico Lobos. Albucrazy is a weird town, but replete with amazing New Mexican food and access to some beautiful places. Also the home of future Notre Dame football coach Bob Davie. Also also, who woulda thought that a show about a sociopathic meth kingpin would actually *improve* public perception of a city?

Dave: Tako--there is still an assorted collection of Texas schools available, but none come with the beautiful city of San Antonio. Perhaps we can interest you in the West Texas Town of El Paso?

Tako: I heard there’s Mexican girls there.

#88 - Matt Takimoto: One of the current hallmarks of the illustrious Big XII conference is its coaches. The mix of standard bearers like Mark Richt and Bob Stoops with up-and-comers like PJ Fleck, Dino Babers, and Mike Norvell provides a strong group of leaders to mold these student-athletes into great players and even better citizens. What I'm saying is, it's time to throw a wrench into the whole thing. Gimme Lane Kiffin and the FAU Owls.

This section of commentary is can be titled RUSTY FLEES THE COUNTRY, AND EVERYBODY GETS WEIRD


Tako: By my count, there are 7 Power 5 teams still on the board. I wonder which one will be the last to go...

Dave: Apparently, we can draft FCS schools, so don't assume they will all get drafted. There's a couple real losers in there.

HRD: If Kentucky doesn't get drafted, I think you're bullshit.

Akili: We know Tony's gonna draft the Beavs, so that leaves six.

Tako: Kentucky's already off the board.

HRD: Oh right. Goodbody might be the conference with even less talent than me

Dave: He's gonna kick ass at basketball, though.

doubleduck: I only see 6 remaining. And, no, this isn't a joke about one of the remaining schools. My board shows only 6 Power 5 teams still left.

Sean G: Just in case you guys have forgotten the once-titanic Kansas Jayhawks football program: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2008_Orange_Bowl

MANGINO FOREVER

doubleduck: You mean the team that has finished in the top 25 just seven times in its 127-year history?

Tako: Sounds like you're gonna miss out on that last Power 5 team then John!

doubleduck: I'm sure I'll be disappointed.

Tako: You won't be, because it's probably UConn.

doubleduck: You do know that UConn is in the AAC, right?

HRD: Is this going in the post? Because YOU PEOPLE SUCK AT JOKES

Tako: I'm pretty sure UConn moving from the ACC to the American would have been in the news. If that were true, who left the American to make room, Maryland?

doubleduck:

Tako: I think that was my first attempt at gaslighting somebody. What a rush! Now I get all the hype.

RUSTY RYAN RETURNS FROM INTERNATIONAL WATERS


Tako: Rusty, you dead?

Rusty: I got back from no internet in Cuba at 3 am this morning and now at work. Kill me.

HRD: Cuba? Awesome, how was it? I have heard mixed reports from visitors since the travel embargo was lifted, but it's high on my list of places to go

Alex: The cigars alone make it sound worth while

Rusty: Cuba was pretty amazing. It's startling though just how different communism is on the daily basis. You know that there are obviously significant differences but it completely changes how people even behave. I would recommend people go. Raul Castro is more open to joining the rest of the world, unlike Fidel, so once American companies are allowed to invest there Cuba will quickly turn into Puerto Rico.

#89 - Rusty Ryan: With a school enrollment of 55,000 in Miami I'm picking up Florida International University. A hotbed for recruiting and a school that could easily charge their students more when they invest in the football team. Miami is also a wonderful place to visit, so I've heard.

Tako: And we're back! Larson for two, and then back around to Rusty.

TWO DAYS LATER

doubleduck:

Sean G:

#90 and #91 - Sean Larson: Finally had time to sit down and look at the map. I really limited myself with this whole 2 hour flight rule BUT WE ARE STICKING TO IT! With my next pick, I take Mississippi State. Soon enough, the next Dak Prescott will come through our conference and put us on the map.

I'll also take Northern Illinois, everyone's favorite BCS crasher. Bringing the MACtion to the Pac-12, giving us PACtion!

Dave: This draft moves at the rate of a Don Pellum pass rush...

Akili: I'm sorry, I didn't realize we were invoking mythical creatures.

Tako: RUSTY IT'S YOUR TURN SWEET JESUS

#92 - Rusty: I'm taking Charlotte. They produced NFL talent this year after moving up to FBS only two seasons ago.

#93 - Tako: The Big XII makes another great choice by digging its teeth into that Silicon Valley money. We take San Jose State.

#94 - Sean G: Gimme the Memphis Tigers. Despite a comment wayyyyyy up in the thread that Memphis isn't actually that cool of a town, the food is dope, music is doper, and - quite frankly - we are running out of sweet college towns.

And, inexplicably, Memphis looks pretty good with Mike Norvell even after Justin Fuente went to Va Tech.

Tako: I took Memphis hella days ago, thus the comment about Memphis not being that cool a town.

#94 - Sean G: Oh, so *that's* why you wrote "Memphis" in your column of the Google Doc.

In lieu of Memphis, give me Marshall. Now, I know next to nothing about Huntington, WV. But I know that Randy Moss was able to hang out there for a couple years. And Byron Leftwich. And Chad Pennington. And (I think) Matthew McConaughey had to at least go there for "We Are Marshall."

Plus, excluding last year's disappointing 3-9 campaign, Marshall went 10-4 in 2013, 13-1 in 2014, and 10-3 in 2015. Some good tradition from the Thundering Herd.

Tako: Yeah sorry, that was mad cryptic when I drafted a team and then wrote their name in my column of the Google Doc, my bad.

Akili: It's totally normal to try and draft an already drafted school. It could happen to ANYONE!

HRD: We really should have had a WWE style draft with no holds barred, pick stealing, attempted murders, chairs over the head, that kind of thing.

#95 - Dave: There is a big school left on the board that has actually been to two Rose Bowls in recent memory and allows my coaches to 'croot Chicago. I'll take the Illinois Fighting Illini.

#96 - Alex: With the Big 10 lacking in some schools with major basketball tradition it’s time for that to change. We’re going to go with the Indiana Hoosiers. This gives someone for Purdue to hate in all sports, and the rest to beat up in every sport except basketball (although recently you can do that too).

HRD: OH MY GOD IT'S ALMOST MY TURN AGAIN

#97 - doubleduck: There is still a team on the board that has a National Championship within the past 35 years. They will also draw tv revenue from Salt Lake City and Mormons everywhere. The Sun Belt is drafting BYU to round out the "Western Division" of the conference.

#98 - HRD: Well that makes my pick even better. Since I've got the 1st, 2nd, 3rd, and 5th ranked passing offenses making their new home in the MAC, (and didn't want those ASSHOLE 4th ranked Cal Bears anyway), I'm moving down the list to 6th and taking East Carolina University, out of Greenville, NC.

I TOTALLY KNEW THIS BEFORE THE INTERNET, but Greenville is known locally as G-Vegas because it's a bastion of sin in the middle of the Bible Belt. A perennial Playboy Top Party School. And they also have the most badass midfield graphic in all of football. Now I just need to manufacture rivalries for LA Tech and ECU.

Akili’s: Damn it that's a good late round pick.

HRD: I had to double check nobody had taken them

Akili’s: Sometimes you double check and still miss it, or so I hear, from a friend.

HRD: WHO COULD POSSIBLY BE THAT STUPID? HEY DID YOU GUYS KNOW THERE'S A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN REPLY AND REPLY ALL?

Tako: Western Carolina is still available, HRD, you'll be fine. #dogs

...Or wait, was that the Coastal Carolina coach? There's too many Carolinas.

HRD: I had to Google it, and goddamnit I'm glad I did.

Akili’s: That was amazing. I think that guy might run for president. /politicsdraft

HRD: Turns out the Chanticleers are joining FBS for 2017 and if any Tony or Eric steal them from me before my next pick then none of you get VIP passes to the Motherfucking Awesome Conference Championship Game Sponsored by Bunny Ranch and Escobar Taxi. Oh who am I kidding, Tony will take the new England Patriots and the New York Yankees.

Akili’s: Trade you for Western Kentucky?

HRD: And give up Conway, The Blood of the Innocents? Pfft that was the best joke of the whole damn draft!

Akili’s: Did you know that a Chanticleer is a fancy rooster from The Canterbury Tales? It's pronounced Shon ti clear, and they call themselves "Shonts" for short. They used to be the Trojans, but changed to be more like the Gamecocks (who they used to be affiliated with) and apparently took heavy input from an English professor.

HRD: I own six chickens (cock fighting underground, don't ask.) I damn well know a chanticleer from a gamecock.

Rusty: I'm a fan of RISD.

Tako: RISD, Todd Cleary's alma mater. His painting "Celebration" is still one of my favorite classical works.

#99 - Akili’s Heel: Western Kentucky still taken?

I'm going history here, because history is a great part of college football. I get three national championships, a major annual award named after one of my alumni, and the only school to ever receive the death penalty. Welcome SMU Mustangs to the Ass Clown Conference.

#100 and #101 - Tony Piraro: Southern Illinois Salukis and Ohio Bobcats

Dave: Southern Illinois? Another non- D1 football school? I guess the real question is what unlucky souls are going to get kicked out of D1 as a result of not getting drafted?

HRD: Don't worry, the Bears will draft them.

#102 - Akili’s Heel: I'm taking James Madison University. Reigning FCS champions are moving up.

#103 - HRD: Alright, Coastal Carolina it is. Conway, SC is in the Myrtle Beach area, and conference fat cats need a place to play golf after all. They'll be taking on the Pirates of ECU in the Carolina Cockfight during MAC CAGE MATCH RIVALRY WEEK SPONSORED BY HOOD RIVER DISTILLERS. And before you remind me what the ECU mascot is, remember that pirates LOVE cockfighting.

#104 - doubleduck: I've got Pitt to recruit eastern Ohio. To recruit western Ohio and draw in those Cincinnati TV revenues, while filling in the geographic gap in the Sun Belt's Eastern Division between NU/Mizzou and PSU/Pitt, we'd like to welcome the RedHawks from Miami of Ohio!

#105 - Alex Rider: Let's go with the oil capital of the world. Tulsa. Oklahoma state needs someone in state to beat up on.

#106 - David Piper: It has to be done. I'm a little paltry on the West Coast. There is one obvious school left. Gonna have to take Oregon State at this point.

#107 - Sean Goodbody: Give me the University of Louisiana at Lafayette Ragin' Cajuns. Consistently 6+ wins and usual R+L Carriers New Orleans Bowl participants, plus Lafayette is, by all accounts, a pretty sweet place to visit.

#108 - Tako: The dream of the 90s is alive in the Big XII! I take Portland State.

Dave: How many Power 5 schools left? I think I count 2...

Tako: I also count 27 FBS teams left for only 14 spots...

THE NEXT DAY...

Tako: RUSTY!!!!!!

THE NEXT DAY AFTER THAT...

HRD: HEY RUSTY I'LL MAKE IT EASIER ON YOU AND EVERYONE ELSE

Akron, Arkansas State, Ball State, UConn, Eastern Michigan, Ga Southern, Ga State, Idaho, Kent State, La-Monroe, UMass, Middle Tenn St., Nevada, New Mexico State, N Texas, Old Dominion, Rice, Rutgers, S Alabama, Texas St, UTEP, Troy, Utah State, and Wake Forest are the FBS schools left on the board.

Feel free to pick some equally competitive directional FCS school, though.

#109 - Rusty Ryan: I take Utah State.

TWO DAYS LATER...

Tako: Have we explored the possibility that Sean Larson was abducted by aliens, or is being held against his will somewhere? Do we need to start a GoFundMe to raise money to buy him back? By the way, Half Baked wouldn't have been a movie in 2017; they'd just have crowdfunded Kenny's bail. SEAN, IF YOU CAN HEAR US, WE'RE COMING TO SAVE YOU!

#110 and #111 - Sean Larson: Good god the list of remaining teams is awful. Ok, for my last two picks....

Give me Southern Miss. If they were good enough for Brett Favre, they're good enough for me. And for my final pick, oh hell, IDK, let me throw a dart at the Eastern Seaboard and see where it lands. Oh look, it landed on UConn! Our plan is to just steal all the money the basketball teams make and funnel it into the football program instead.

THE NEXT DAY...

Tako: RUSTYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!

Rusty: I’ll get to it this afternoon.

/Ron Howard’s voiceover: He wouldn’t.

doubleduck:

Dave: Rusty takes Eastern Oregon University.

Rusty: I’m the worst.

/Ron Howard’s voiceover: He’s right.

doubleduck:

Dave: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

THE NEXT DAY...

Tako: Should we just call this a Vikings at the NFL Draft situation and move on?

Rusty: I'll do it tonight! And I mean it this time.

/Ron Howard’s voiceover: He didn’t.

HRD: I STILL HAVE JOKES TO MAKE NEVER SAY DIE

#112 - Mercifully, Rusty Ryan: Close to the NYC media market and one of the first participants in the first ever college football game: Rutgers.

HRD:

#113 - Tako: For my last pick, I'll take a school in a big TV market in the middle of the recruit-rich South. All that stands between them and being a power player in college football is money and a chance. The Big XII can offer them both. I'm taking ATL's finest, the Georgia State Panthers.

#114 - Sean Goodbody: GIve me the Middle Tennessee State Blue Raiders. Act like you guys don't want to go hang out in Murfreesbro, TN.

#115 - David Piper: We want to recruit, recruit, recruit. A second presence in Texas gives us a better chance to do that. This is also a really big school (30k+ students) who will really have the chance to grow their program in our conference. The AAC completes their conference with Texas State.

Sean G: As an added bonus, Texas State is the alma mater of both Sinbad and Scott Bakula.

#116 - Alex Rider: The Big 10 wants to dive into Texas like the rest. We’ll go with the Rice Owls. Plus this way we get to have an Owl-off between rice and temple.

Tako: FAU would like to schedule yearly home-and-homes with Rice and Temple to battle for Owl supremacy. Kiffin says they'll play both Rice and Temple at once, because he doesn't make good choices.

HRD: Frigging Hogwarts nerds.

Tako: I wanted to make fun of the mascots in your conference, HRD, but then I looked:

Cougars
Red Raiders
Big Red
Aztecs
Bulldogs
Cowboys
Broncos
Falcons
Bulls
Pirates
Chanticleers

Damnit, you did well on that front. The only thing you're missing is, like, ninjas or dinosaurs.

HRD: I made several picks based primarily on mascot or school colors. I mean what did everyone else focus on, merit and talent? AYN RAND WOULD BE SO PROUD OF ALL OF YOU.

ALSO COME ON DOUBLEDUCK, TAKO TUESDAY IS TOMORROW. LET'S WRAP IT UP.

Alex: Let’s make it a pee-wee style round robin scrimmage. Big 10 will provide the orange slices.

#117 - doubleduck: There have been stretches of DAYS, WEEKS even, without picks. Don't get all shouty at me when it takes me one hour to get my pick submitted. Goddamned hippies.

For my final pick, the Sun Belt is aiming to present an opportunity for refound glory. We're jumping well past the Group of 5 all the way to Division III. We've spoken with the administration (we haven't), and they have stated their intent to reinvigorate the athletics at their program (they haven't). As a founding member of the original Big 10, and the school who boasts the winner of the first ever Heisman (Jay Berwanger was also the first overall pick in the first ever NFL draft), the University of Chicago has prestigious history to go with its outstanding academics. Oh, also, Chicago's a huge city and will be great for tv revenues and recruiting. So there's that.

Welcome to the Sun Belt, Chicago Maroons!

#118 - HRD: Shouting is like 70% of my comedy. Hey, it worked for Sam Kinison.

After long, careful consideration (read: Italian mobsters showing up at the MAC offices with several heavy, heavy briefcases), the MAC selects Nevada with its final pick. I missed on Vegas, so have to settle for Reno, known euphemistically as its redheaded stepsister (OMG SO HAWT THO). Lake Tahoe is one of the most beautiful places in the world, and this conference really wasn't complete without legal gambling and prostitution as part of its nationwide brand.

The Wolfpack will play the La Tech Bulldogs during rivalry week in The Dogfight, sponsored (shocker) by MGM Resorts International.

(The other 30% of my comedy, obviously, is parenthetical asides.)

Also John, if you need help with your Berwanger, please make an appointment with my assistant on your way out of the draft room.

HRD: Is this a conference footprint, or what?

Tako: You need Minnesota-Duluth to grab some territory in the north.

HRD: I'm mostly glad to leave the stench of the entire state Florida off the schedule.

Tako: That's fine, I'll be over here with all the fast kids in my conference. #theU #OWLcatraz

#119 - Akili’s Heel: Apparently I'm up, also apparently I took James Madison with my last pick...ok.

If they're good enough for Vernon Adams, they're good enough for me. Welcome to the big time Eastern Washington.

(I checked the spreadsheet on my phone, I can't believe HRD didn't already take them.)

HRD: They would be under serious MAC consideration were it nor for their ridiculous field.

Tako: Still one Power 5 school available...will Tony take them?

#120 - Tony: With the last pick of the draft, I will conclude this marathon with the AKRON ZIPS. I heard LeBron was going to be their starting TE after he retires. Supposedly, he has 4 years of eligibility...

HRD: Who didn’t get drafted?

doubleduck: Wake Forest, winners of the 2002 Seattle Bowl.

Larson: Guys, it's over. I literally don't know what to do with my life anymore. LET'S DO IT FOR BASKETBALL NOW!!!!

/fin


What a ride. Now, I know there’s no one reading this right now because no one in their right mind would spend their time reading all of the 4300 meaningless words up there. But, in case you accidentally scrolled too far up from the comments section, you can take a look at the full conference rosters we’ve created. And I think you’ll agree, we’ve made a beautiful mess.

Tony Piraro’s SEC: Alabama, Washington, Louisville, Tennessee, Boise State, Kansas State, Northwestern, South Florida, North Carolina State, Southern Illinois, Ohio, and Akron

Akili’s Heel’s ACC: Oregon, Stanford, Auburn, South Carolina, TCU, North Dakota, Utah, Toledo, Air Force, SMU, James Madison, and Eastern Washington

hoodriverduck’s MAC: Washington State, Texas Tech, Western Kentucky, San Diego State, Wyoming, Western Michigan, Bowling Green, Louisiana TechBuffalo, East Carolina, Coastal Carolina, and Nevada

doubleduck’s Sun Belt: USC, Penn State, Texas A&M, Nebraska, Houston, Pitt, Missouri, Fresno State, Baylor, BYU, Miami (OH), and U. of Chicago

AJR_425’s Big Ten: Ohio State, LSU, Oklahoma State, Michigan State, Arkansas, Virginia, Iowa, Purdue, Temple, Indiana, Tulsa, and Rice

David Piper’s American Conference: Michigan, Florida, Georgia, Arizona State, Central Florida, Cal, North Carolina, Cincinnati, UTSA, Illinois, Oregon State, and Texas State

Sean Goodbody’s Mountain West: Wisconsin, Florida State, Virginia Tech, West Virginia, Iowa State, Colorado State, Kansas, Kentucky, New Mexico, Marshall, Louisiana-Lafayette, and Middle Tennessee State

Matt Takimoto’s Big XII: Miami, Oklahoma, Colorado, Ole Miss, Tulane, Minnesota, Memphis, Syracuse, Florida Atlantic, San Jose State, Portland State, and Georgia State

Rusty Ryan’s Conference USA: Texas, UCLA, Hawaii, UNLV, Vanderbilt, Georgia Tech, Arizona, Boston College, Florida International, Charlotte, Utah State, and Rutgers

Sean Larson’s Pac-12: Notre Dame, Clemson, Army, Navy, Maryland, Duke, Central Michigan, Appalachian State, Mississippi State, Northern Illinois, Southern Miss, and UConn

We’ve got one more post in the series, our post-draft wrap up. Given our current rate of speed, look for this one sometime in August.