BREAKING: Willie Taggart returns to WKU, to pick up forgotten stuff, then goes back to USF

The coaching staff and players of the University of Southern Florida football team were shocked this morning when the news broke that former WKU-USF-Oregon-FSU-ASU-UW coach Willie Taggart would be taking over the vacant USF job after a brief stop at Western Kentucky University for some of his things.

"...What he explained to me was (USF) was a place he admired as a youngster and early on in his career. It held a special place in his heart from a young age," said a drunken Floridian.

The tear-drenched Taggart addressed a skeptical group of players, then left too abruptly for further questioning.

Two hours later, Taggart appeared at a USF press conference. After riveting opening remarks and a standing ovation, the new head coach left with a smile.

"Have a great day if you want to," he said with one foot out the door.

This is a FanPost and does not necessarily reflect the views of SB Nation or the Addicted To Quack Moderators. FanPost opinions are valued expressions of opinion by passionate and knowledgeable Oregon fans.